Funny but Astonishing Things about Igbo and Yoruba

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Funny but Astonishing Things about Igbo and Yoruba

It has become pertinent to join in this age-long debate between the Yorubas and Igbos with the sole aim of funnily presenting the diversities embedded in the various cultures for reasons of increasing our unity. Yes, unity is in diversity because when there is unity in diversity, prosperity will exist in perpetuity, because lass lass na cooperation dey make rice full pot.

In this write-up, I will succinctly display some funny characteristics generally portrayed by both tribes for the purpose humour, entertainment and information, nothing else. The alcohol that is insufficient for a whole town ought not to intoxicate one man. So, read up for fun and not for any other thing!

1. Get-Togethers

When it comes to a get-together, the Yorubas don’t like a silent, quiet, dull environment. They prefer making the place lively, especially when they get together, either by loud talks or playing loud music, dancing and showing how happy they are. Na person wey dey alive dey chop food, dead man no know wetin rice dey taste like.

I must confess that this is a very interesting sight to behold because your ears will be filled with information about anything and everything. The parties of the Yorubas are the best in the world, they spend all they have got to host a party, so as to be the talk of the town. Wale no mind borrow money from the bank to take throw party.

Irrespective of who you are, come ye all who are heavily hungry, the Yorubas will give your belly rest. The food is very much, the meat, as big as my head. To them a party should never lack food and drinks, it’s like an abomination to have a party and have a shortage of food.

The Igbos, on the other hand, like a silent, quiet environment, notice I didn’t bother typing the word ”dull”. This is because within themselves, family relatives and few friends, they make themselves happy, in their own private corners. And how can they do this, they copy the western lifestyle, they make provisions for enough drinks, they turn their gathering into a long silent meeting, discussing the present and future or solving a particular problem. A good display of material things like cars, electronics or cash is the norm to show social status. Chibuzor in Ladipo won’t mind borrowing a car to take back to the village during Christmas, at least if dem no praise Lizard, Lizard go praise himself. This type of gathering is male-dominated. With the females running around trying to make everything works out as planned. But the gathering is strictly by invitation, don’t come there uninvited or the gaze will be on you like someone who pooed on the body before coming.

2. Conflict/Fighting
The Yorubas.
What will take the Igbos, both males and females just 10mins of voice raising, exchange of words, and show of self, during a conflicting encounter will take the Yorubas two hours to finish up their fight. Not only will it take a long time before the argument ends, but then, everyone around in the Yoruba settings will each get a full download of what transpired, most times their argument is more of repetition of words, over and over again.

I also noticed that when the Yorubas are angry about a matter they barely can hold it within themselves ( in fact the more they voice out, the better they analyze it).

They just want to share it with anyone who cares to listen, as long as you are ready to spend a great deal of your time to listen. The other day at the bus stop a fight ensued between two bus conductors, the next thing I heard was ’’ bros shebi you dey here’’ (me that I’m just coming to the bus stop, how I’m I supposed to know, I bewitch??) but please make sure you support their explanation, at that particular moment, then when the opposite party also calls you separately for their own narration of the situation, make sure you also support them too. Everyone is right method. The good thing is, once they do this (voice their mind), they have thrown their burdens away, tomorrow is going to be a better attitude.
The Igbos
The Igbo’s during a fight, hardly make a noise, a fight can be happening in the next door of your neighbour but you will hardly hear a drop of a pin. This surprises me, even their women! to see women fight without noise??? My dear, don’t sleep on this, it is the calm and silent water that drowns a man.
This people, after saying their mind, delivering their points, will make threats, exchanging blows at times and then walk away. Rarely will the noise be heard by the neighbours. The bad thing is, they never forget. In fact, it may take generations to forget. Once they make up their mind at you, that is it. While the Yorubas will fight because of little things like a broom, a plantation, or a child, the Igbos’ fight really starts from, larger things like envy emanating from social status/competition, especially land, don’t joke with an Igbo man when it comes to land matters! You might not live to tell the story.

3. Education
The Yorubas
The Yorubas are the most educated ethnic group in Nigeria and maybe in the world, they may not be fluent in speaking English, but their brain is fully attentive to math, medicine, engineering, and the rest.

They don’t like stressful jobs. Jobs that require much energy, labour and strength (They easily get tired, how many Yoruba Boys have you seen offloading containers at Ladipo market? Wey the strength dey?) They prefer exercising brain power to body power. They rather depend on the power of the pen, they don’t worship (respect) or look in envy at the rich and wealthy, but what stirs them is when they know you have got something upstairs, trains of degree, honours’.

A survey recently has it that the most educated people in Nigeria with the highest number of PhD holders is a state in Yoruba Land, Ekiti state precisely. That’s what will only make them respect, bow and envy such a person. Not wealth, like the other tribes.
The Igbos
The Igbos right from time, have never believed in it. With the way things are currently going in the country, you might just want to say that they were right after all these years. I mean look at all the jobless graduate roaming the streets, with no solid talent or gift, or hand work what so ever, but the average Igbo man will look deep into the future and say, ” it will take me 6 years to finish school and serve my nation, and I would spend not less than 800k or more throughout those year, why don’t I invest this 800k in the next six years, I would not only employ a graduate but will marry one. And true to their word, they build a business empire, living comfortably, and they end up wooing a university graduate while we the educated ones only have English to speak, nothing in the pocket! This boils down to the fact that not everyone thinks this way. A few of them has taken the bull by the horn and on their own challenged other tribes when it comes to brain power, surprisingly they have not been disappointing, only for them to get the degree and head back to business. When they are serious about reading, studying, they are a force to reckon with. I don’t know about the Hausas or Fulanis. Somebody at the helm of affairs in our great country has only NEPA bill as a credential, so I will not be surprised.

4. Business
When it comes to matters concerning business and money, the Igbo’s can’t be surpassed, just like the parable of the talents, give an Igbo man a thousand naira and it will surprise you how he will make a million out of it.

But the same cannot be said exactly about an average Yoruba businessman, but this doesn’t mean we don’t have successful businessmen from the western part of the county. House rent, today, is expensive in Lagos, the reason is simply that of Igbos. They have aided landlords to inflate house rent figures. An average Igbo man doesn’t mind paying close to a million naira rent for a 2 bedroom flat, a Yoruba man can’t entertain such, after all, it is the fear of tomorrow that makes a tortoise carry his house on his head. wherever he goes.