4 Reasons Not to Disclose Your Wedding Problems
When the relationship is in crisis it is common for spouses to seek friends and family to vent and ask for help. The problem is that people are not always ready to help and end up “buying the fight”. Inviting people outside the relationship to participate in a difficult time of the couple, almost always, makes everything worse.
I know that you are suffering and need someone to vent, but would you be prepared not to be influenced by the opinions of others? Making space for interference is always very dangerous.
Reflect on these reasons to keep your marital difficulties confidential:
1. Do not expose yourself and your spouse
Talking about marital problems almost always exposes intimacies that can cause great embarrassment. That way, you are allowing someone else to judge situations that you often do not understand. You can trust the people you talk to, but do not forget that they trust others as well. Is it worth seeing your world unraveled like this?
Of course you will choose the right person to vent, but will that person be on your side or on the side of your relationship? See that they are different things.
2. When one takes one side, naturally, it excludes the other.
Bias distorts events because it represents a unilateral and rectilinear view of situations. Friends and family tend to take the pains of their affections to themselves and those who do not see the whole do not give reliable opinions.
To begin with, when you discuss your marital problems with close friends and family, they hear only your side of the story, which by definition is incomplete and distorted.
3. Regrets are common
When we are stressed or irritated we tend to welcome the opinions of others without proper attention to what really matters in our lives. To act in a passionate way is to open the way to suffering, almost always, we repent later.
Not to mention that when we are with the changed moods we see the situation much worse than it really is. So we end up getting even more involved in negative emotions. Silence is often a source of peace and wisdom.
4. More heads, more sentences
If you and your partner are unable to understand each other on their own, imagine joining in on their friends ‘and family members’ opinions. The confusion will only increase.
A problem analyzed by several people takes on varied characteristics that almost never represent the ideal for the couple involved. It is most advisable for spouses to seek to understand one another’s feelings through clear and affectionate dialogue.
In addition, remember that the crisis will pass and it is quite possible that you overcome and get back together. However, the negative judgment made by friends and family will remain and will fatally create an unwillingness to remain together. Too bad, is not it?
When the couple can not cope with their difficulties alone, it is best to seek specialist knowledge and professional help to solve crises and harmonize their relationship.
Keep your marriage free from several predators. You can try as much as possible to settle the differences and then enjoy the marriage.